“Ring by spring” is a common catchphrase used to refer to the pressure many couples feel to get engaged by springtime. The joke is often used on Christian campuses, insinuating that the couples should hurry and tie the knot before they graduate. Interestingly enough, statistics show that 40 to 50 percent of Americans get divorced. And yet the “ring by spring” mentality still prevails on many Christian campuses. Why?
I always heard rumors of “ring by spring” in high school, but I just scoffed as though it were another myth of college life. It wasn’t until I got into college that I realized it’s a very real thing. Many students, both single and in relationships, feel tremendous pressure to find their soulmate in college. Adventist culture seems to tell young people that they have failed as adults if they have not at least gotten engaged by graduation. Why?
“Adventism has a culture of marrying young for a variety of reasons–Jesus’ soon coming, family life being central to life in general and resistance to marrying a ‘non-Adventist,’” says Suny Gomez, junior communication studies and Spanish major. “ If you're graduated and not even dating, a stigma is definitely there.”
Senior mass communication major George Nelson states that secular colleges do not
follow the same model. “I didn't find any of this to be a thing in the secular university that I attended for two years. I'd say that the phrase ‘shoot the breeze’ is the more practiced idea in a secular environment.”
There is much to be discussed over the cause and validity of this phenomenon. Maybe it’s the millions of Pinterest boards we scroll through to see picturesque weddings. Maybe it’s the fact that marriage is increasingly becoming a social taboo and Christians are trying to preserve it. Maybe it’s a conglomeration of a thousand things that work together to make up this mentality that people must be married by the end of their college career to have any worth in the spiritual world.
Whatever the cause of this pressure, the experience is different for everyone.
“It also depends on the social circle you are in,” said Danielle Allen, senior global policy and journalism major. “Personally, I don't feel a pressure to be married or in a relationship at the moment because I am working on my degrees and hoping to pursue a professional degree. For others who are raised in more conservative circles, the pressure to be married or at least seriously dating/courting is a serious dilemma.”