Disclaimer: While the Southern Accent staff does not support using stereotypes as a lense for viewing cultures and people, we acknowledge that many people make light of their shared experiences of growing up in cultural households. When reading the following piece, we encourage you, the reader, to see this as such.
After having thoroughly studied ethnicity and culture, I can say one thing – I still can’t really tell you the difference between ethnicity and culture. However, because of my clear qualifications, it has come to my attention that some of us are genetically prone to what I am going to call “Latinx in Need” (LIN) disease. Yes, those affected by this disease could die because I need this disease to sound scary enough to use the word “critically.” It is critically important that we help our Latinx friends stay healthy. We want to help our comrades maintain a high level of Latino-ness. Give them Latin-American food here and there, you know?
According to some research done by some guy somewhere at one time or another, it is crucial that Latinxs stay Latinx for reasons. Just help, okay? Consider Latin American Month as Latin American Awareness Month and help a Latinx out. We need to become familiar with the symptoms of LIN disease so as to help them keep those levels up. If you don’t know how to recognize a LIN disease, here’s a list to help you find them:
1. The soap hasn’t run out yet:
Just when you thought the liquid soap wouldn’t make it another day, they went and filled that sucker up with water.
2. Flip flops embody their biggest fears:
If the parentals were to take off “la chancla” you hope that their target is the fly on the wall and not you.
3. You follow the two hour rule (or more) with them:
Them: When are we supposed to be there?
You: 6:00 p.m.… when you really mean 8:00 p.m.
4. Vicks Vapo Rub:
You: Dude, I broke my leg
Them: Put some Vivaporú (Vicks Vapo Rub) on that!
5. Cousins:
Ask them how many cousins they have and see how long it takes them.
6. Spanish class:
The kid you would pick to help you do your Spanish homework is probably Latinx.
7. Rolling your r’s:
Their Adventist party trick is rolling their r’s.
8. The cafeteria:
They become a Food Network judge when the international bar is serving Latin-American food.
9. Christmas:
They are not too sure which Christmas to celebrate between December 24 and December 25, so they go with the most convenient one.
10. Interpretive Movements (at Southern):
They claim they cannot dance. What you just saw were interpretive movements.
